Answer to Doctor Sepiida
Frakkin’ character limit, splitting this up…. You seem to be offering your opinions on hypothetical John x Karkat scenarios, so I’ll just leave this here. The trolls have learned about the birds and the bees, the humans have learned about the drones and the grub, and it turns out that there is little or no difference between male and female troll genitalia….
John and Karkat’s canon love interests are dealt with: Rose is with Kanaya, while Terezi and Jade are busy with Dave (maybe they’re just chasing after him, maybe the three of them ended up together). Karkat flipped flushed for John, which trolls sometimes do, and John reciprocated. From John’s PoV, Karkat’s his flat-chested alien sitcom girlfriend, based on the “if it walks like a duck” line of reasoning….
She doesn’t like being called a girl because she’s a tomboy or because of some alien cultural thing, but he’s sure she’s female (or, at the very least, an alien hermaphrodite who’s female enough), her nook is definitely some sort of weird looking alien vagina and her bone bulge is definitely some alien thing with no human equivalent, it’s definitely not a penis and no amount of teasing from Dave or Rose will change that….
From Karkat’s PoV, he is definitely 100% male and John’s crazy human “not a homosexual” thing is annoying. They both try to avoid annoying and awkward arguments about gender. The fic tells the story of how John and Karkat got to this point. Sorry if splitting this up makes it hard to post a response.
There are still an awful lot of problems with this.
while Terezi and Jade are busy with Dave (maybe they’re just chasing after him, maybe the three of them ended up together)
You’ll have to go into this, particularly if they end up in a threesome. And particularly you’ll have to give a reason why Karkat would be willing to accept this horse shit. Why would be tolerate Dave picking up all of the bipches? And for that matter why would be be motivated to give up on his pursuit of Jade? Or Terezi for that matter, although she makes for a slightly lesser issue.
Karkat flipped flushed for John, which trolls sometimes do, and John reciprocated.
Why? With regards to both of them. Why would Karkat flip flushed for John? You couldn’t even pull a straight Black->Red Flip because by this point in canon Karkat seems to have completely moved past his original black crush. And even past that, why would John reciprocate?
From John’s PoV, Karkat’s his flat-chested alien sitcom girlfriend, based on the “if it walks like a duck” line of reasoning….
She doesn’t like being called a girl because she’s a tomboy or because of some alien cultural thing, but he’s sure she’s female (or, at the very least, an alien hermaphrodite who’s female enough), her nook is definitely some sort of weird looking alien vagina and her bone bulge is definitely some alien thing with no human equivalent, it’s definitely not a penis and no amount of teasing from Dave or Rose will change that….
From Karkat’s PoV, he is definitely 100% male and John’s crazy human “not a homosexual” thing is annoying. They both try to avoid annoying and awkward arguments about gender.
This is just flat-out impossible. While it is strictly speaking possible that both troll genders possess the same genitalia, it is not possible for them to only have one functional gender in the way you’re describing. Trolls do have physical genders and more importantly they have gender identities, Vriska has identified herself as a girl to both John and Karkat, the latter of which was before either even knew Humans existed.
So yes, even if Karkat doesn’t have a penis he still acts like he does, basically. And that is just as, if not more important. If you don’t believe me, pretend you were dating your gender of choice, but they acted, moved and spoke with the voice of a gender you aren’t so particular about.
You also don’t address Vriska. She is kind of important. (This line contains spoilers regarding the End of Act 5)
